Today I was trying to think of a song that really got on my nerves when I was at high school. This was mainly because this morning I began to think about how I used to agree with everyone at school. I was so different to everyone else that I thought if I really said what I was thinking I’d have no-one to talk to. That’s what it felt like anyway.
One day a school friend said how she loved this particular song I absolutely loathed…. and I agreed it was a really choice song.
It was the worst … it made me want to strangle myself with my bare hands to escape the ….God…..the pathetic sob story. This song, it contrasts how this bloke would feel if whatshername left him – with how he would feel if she didn’t… I
t is originally a French song and the French version, well it’s even more atrocious in its sentiment than the English version…but at least it’s honest in its sentiment. It says what it is, it says I want humiliate myself before you. The English version is in the key of a half-whine. A semi quaver, as in, it makes you want to quaver…well, half quaver. …“.~~~~.“….that’s me quavering.
So, through a series of funny emails with a friend today, I was remembering this God awful song. It took a while ‘cos I haven’t thought of it for a very long time. And thank God, I haven’t heard it either!!
The thing about this painful song is….you know….if you’re in this much pain…take an aspirin and go to bed or finish that bottle of pinot gris or or or or…I mean, there are infinite possibilites.
Just don’t tell me your problems.
Ok, the song is If You Go Away and it’s the version by the bloke who did it in the mid 70s. I don’t know his name. Maybe it sounds different if Shirley Bassey or Nirvana did it. In the French version it’s called Don’t Leave Me. At least that’s straight up self humiliation and supplication. If You Go Away….what’s that saying? This bloke knows she’s going to leave, it’s fait accompli, so there’s not really any ‘if’ about it.
Apparently this title If You Go Away is supposed to instill hope, she might change her mind. Mate, there is no hope, the Frogs get that and don’t lie about it. In the French version, he is fried frogs legs. In our version, we know he’s toast even if he’s still deluded.
Ok, some lyrics: You must tell the world To stop turning ’til you return again If you ever do Is this meant to be romantic?? This is the 25th reason she’s leaving. Crap lyrics.
There is nothing left In this world to trust Just an empty room Full of empty space Like the empty look I see on your face And I’d have been the shadow Of your shadow If you might have kept me By your side. That’s the bit that so creeps me out. “I’d like to be the shadow of your shadow.” Brrrrr, that’s me semi quivering again. The French version is : “Let me become the shadow of your shadow, the shadow of your hand, the shadow of your dog” Yeah it’s creepier than the English version but once you start wanting to cling to someone’s shadow, you may as well wax lyrically about that fact and take it all the way….to the dog’s shadow.
Here’s the full version of the song. Bet you fall asleep before you get to the bit about….leave me just enough love to fill up my hand..where does he get them from?
If you go away On this summer’s day Then you might as well Take the sun away All the birds that flew In the summer sky When our love was new And our hearts were high And the day was young And the nights were long And the moon stood still For the night bird’s song If you go away If you go away If you go away… But if you stay I’ll make you a day Like no day has been Or will be again We’ll sail on the sun We’ll ride on the rain And talk to the trees And worship the wind But if you go I’ll understand Leave me just enough love To fill up my hand If you go away If you go away If you go away… If you go away As I know you will You must tell the world To stop turning ’til you return again If you ever do For what good is love Without loving you? Can I tell you now As you turn to go I’ll be dying slowly ’til the next hello If you go away If you go away If you go away… But if you stay I’ll make you a night Like no night has been Or will be again I’ll sail on your smile I’ll ride on your touch I’ll talk to your eyes That I love so much But if you go I won’t cry Though the good is gone From the word goodbye If you go away If you go away If you go away… If you go away As I know you must There is nothing left In this world to trust Just an empty room Full of empty space Like the empty look I see on your face And I’d been the shadow Of your shadow If you might have kept me By your side If you go away If you go away If you go away… If you go away If you go away…